and what have you done this year?

it's that time of year again. time to haul out the holly, deck the halls, trim the tree, and blissfully enter into a winter wonderland. yes, you guessed it...it's christmas!
now this christmas i was tempted to put out a nativity scene, place a symbolic star on top of my martin luther inspired tree, and attend a candlelight service on christmas eve with my friends and family, BUT why bother with all that jazz when i could be piecing together my CHRISTMAS NEWSLETTER!
yes friends, the newsletter. that most important of christmas symbols. the glorious piece of paper that accompanies my festive cards and allows me an outlet for sharing all the reasons i'm cooler than you. since it is so terribly important i thought it would just be selfish of me to not share my year with all my blogging buddies. i hope you enjoy reading about my year as much as i enjoyed actually participating in it.
**please read the following anticipating my voice inflection...it will be more fun that way! and also please read with the lens of a girl who thinks this entire practice is nothing more than a platform for bragging and embellishing. i have always believed that a life worth knowing about need not advertise.**



THE PIERCE PAGES
A SEASONAL NEWSLETTER FROM THE HEART OF MY HOME TO YOURS!

2011 has been a whirlwind of a year! where has the time gone?! haha but seriously, it seems like only yesterday i was unpacking boxes in my brand new home and trying to find the perfect duvet to compliment my beautiful estate sale furniture! yes, home ownership has consumed most of my year and has directly correlated to my increased number of visits to bed, bath, and beyond!
all that aside 2011, has been a year full of blessings! one blessing is the crazy increase in miles that my frequent flyer program has seen. i have been a real jet setter! when i wasn't enjoying theology classes at Princeton Theological Seminary i made time for delicious cheesecake in New York! my sweet friend katie accompanied me in the big apple and boy did we leave our southern mark! my next adventure sent me, katie, and my dad packing for Boston! who doesn't love a Red Sox game at Fenway! really the green monster (or green monstah as the natives say) is second to none. it was just a little short trip at the end of the summer. we all needed a little baseball escape! the next trip will take katie, terri, and i to Charleston over new years to see our dear friend susan. we couldn't think of a better way to ring in the new year.
now not all my travels were for pleasure. my sweet youth girls and i had a weekend retreat to Asheville. the Biltmore is so amazing...we were like princesses for a day! i also spent two weeks doing mission work for those less fortunate. one trip took my group to Hazard, KY where we did some serious home repair and the next trip took us to Myrtle Beach where we were instrumental in starting a new church. what an amazing experience. God is good!
now, you didn't think this east tennessee gal would spend all her time away! of course i had to be home for football season! this year my vols broke my heart a little, but that didn't mean we couldn't still enjoy all the tradition of big orange football. the vol navy was out in force and the time on the water is totally worth the work it takes climbing from boat to boat. the hot dogs were perfect and coach dooley's pants were just right.
on a not so positive note my poor hip and back have been in a mess. i think that mission work and all that time on the tennessee river have caused some injury. so physical therapy is the name of the game and the outlook is good! (i hope)
in other news, i've bought a new car, a couple of new Kate Spade bags (to die for), and of course clothes that still have the tags!! it's so hard to pass up a great sale! haha
last but not least, ellie may (i know you were wondering), is doing beautifully. she is still the most impressive K9 i have ever encountered. i am concerned that she may have a faulty thyroid, but that is completely treatable. she has her stocking hung by the chimney with care and i know she is dreaming of all the dentasticks that will fill it up on christmas morning.
well, i have already said too much. this letter always gets away from me! so, until i have a chance to share with you how important i am next year--i hope you and yours have a completely MERRY CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR!
all my love, Sara

the good, the bad, and the bald.

so in light of all the recent "in my faceness" that the world of relationships has provided me i have decided to weigh in on the subject.
i have noticed that there are 3 types of men that seem to always take up space in my atmosphere, the good, the bad and the bald. now yes, some men are more than one of these things. for example, i recently had an encounter with a guy who seemed good, was really bad, and totally bald. he was a rare bird...one i was sure was met with extinction by the age of 30. not this joker. rare. now i also know someone who is good and bald. he's not such a rarity. most 30-something dads are good (out of necessity) and bald is often an unfortunate by-product. but all the same he fits the type. i have also recently exchanged words with a just pain good male. nice, attractive, fairly hip, and unthreatning. likewise i have also met bad...every female knows this clown. they make bee lines for all breathing women in public places. often they are wearing graphis tees and sporting a fedora. now good and bad is a combo that i think is a true myth. can you really be an even mixture of good and bad...no way. everyone leans one way or the other. so any male who advertises himself as a good 'bad' boy is instantly on my lidar. these cats are a mystery and really best left untouched...they may not be up-to-date on their shots.
so now that i have described the types i will share why this alarms me so. ready, here goes. none of them are dateable dudes. the good ones are typically taken (by females who leave little to be desired). the bad ones are trainwrecks and really no upper 20s female needs a project THAT consuming. i mean, it even requires wardrobe transitions...not cool. the bad and bald have 2 instant strikes. they bring a crap game to the plate and any girl with even a shread of integrity will strike this guy out before he even snags a number. the good and bald are wonderful to know and are totally pre-occupied, but maintain these friendships because one day they and thier families will be who you go to chuck-e-cheese with on friday nights. and the good 'bad' guys...again, liars.
after breaking down the subjects that i tend encounter i realized that i am single out of necessity. i am solo for the sake of dodging embarassment. and i am buying plane tickets for 1 because there are currently no valid travel partner options.
so here's to all the other gals who attract hot messes. here's to the girls who go home on friday nights thinking "i shaved my legs for that?" and here's to the ladies who are single because an acceptable alternative seems to also be hiding out in his house DVR-ing the same episodes of the big bang theory in an effort to skip all the uncomfortable rituals of mating.

why, thank you, i needed that...

so i know that a proper lady sends thank you cards. i have ranted about the lack of proper ladies lately. i know that you don't look a gift horse in the mouth. i know that you fake love the ugly socks in your stocking. i know this cause i was raised right. but i've always wondered if there was a limit to how much faking you could do when the gift was just so shocking that your brain didn't have time to fake and could only go "good golly what the poo?"
this happened to me recently. i got a box of books delivered to me at work. used books that an older man's daughter had used but no longer needed. books he thought he would pass along to me just in case i could use them...for the youth or something. upon closer inspection of the items i wondered...were these really intended for my 14 year olds??

now, like i said, i know how to respond to any gift. people bring me old food, notepads and pens they've stolen from doctor's offices, rocks, socks, and coin purses. for real, work in a church and you too can be showered with gifts from the elderly. but, never in all of my days have i gotten books about how to land a man. this is for sure the best gift i've ever gotten because by george not only is it thoughtful...it's so useful!
i have often wondered why people assume that i would never choose my single life. people seem to think that it must be the result of something bad i've done in a previous life, or that i am secretly a nun, or that i have such low self-esteem that i couldn't possibly be in a productive relationship. well, folks, let me address these completely logical trains of thought.
1. i like being single.
now, do i intend to be single sara forever, no. but, right now it works and i don't intend to force a change.
2. i don't believe in past lives...thus i can not possibly be punnished for one.
3. i think i am pretty freaking great. i am smart, employeed, clean, crafty, financially stable, a wee bit witty, and juggling all these sweet traits with a non-offensive demeanor. i call that winning...not death by solitude.
4. i do like nuns a lot. i do not intend to be one. the shoes are terrible.
so all that said i would like to say that while the books were so terribly kind (i know it would make my life easier if i had a big strong man around the house to kill bugs, open jars, and reach the top shelf) please do not assume a fundamental part of my life is missing because i am able to manage perfectly with a one car garage. please do not assume that i am broken hearted and sad because i have to rsvp 1 to special events. please do not be nervous on my behalf that my biological clock may explode before i ever start trying to make babies. please don't worry about my house being invaded by woman eating insects, i pay a bug guy. and please, know that i can open my own jars...i have a gripper thing that has never let me down.
so here's to the single ladies who fight off set-ups like it's their full-time job. here's to the single ladies who mow their own yards (i don't but i know some of you do). here's to the single ladies who have managed to find meaning in their pitiful, lonely, unnatural lives. and here's to all the people who think we would give our right arm to change it all...oops. you're bad.