officer, please, do not shoot me.

for anyone who didn't know i am a youth director. that is another way to say youth pastor, director of youth ministries, blah blah...
i work at a cumberland presbyterian church in small town, tennessee and (for the most part) love it. now don't get me wrong, every job has its high and low points but more often than not i'm feeling the highs.
the last event i hosted will, however, be listed in the list of low points for quite some time. it is the end of the school year here and, being a swell youth director, i planned a super fun first day out lock-in. now, for those of you who don't know what a lock-in is i'll tell you. it is another way to say youth director sleep torture. i stay up all night with rowdy kids and make sure that they are entertained for the entire night...all the while making sure they stay "locked-in" the church. awesome.

well we were chugging right along...a trip to the Minister's Treehouse, a Babe Ruth baseball game, dinner at zaxby's, and a late night showing of Irom Man 2. I was in the running for director of the year until we got back to the building and discovered all things tied to chaos.
an unindetified car was parked in the parking lot and lights were on in the building that should not have been. ok, big deal. well until one of my most responsible kiddos said "i see someone!" that little statement alone shoved us into a state of emergency. they had spyed someone in the building and they were freaking out. and honestly, they freaked me out. so...i called the police department. yes, i'm a drama queen and a chicken (all rolled into one).
long story short, i had to (with the protection of 3 armed-yes armed and ready- officers) search the church and unlock doors straight NYPD style. or as i prefer CSI:NY style. i got scared. not of the intruders but of the police officers. i was afriad i was going to get shot. not the glamorous ending i had in mind at all. the kids had to be locked into the bus guarded by another police officer. and the unidentified car was being searched and such. i was lucky that all the chaos the police officer that stayed with me was beautiful, and charming, and just my age :)
anywho, i didn't land a sweet date with a good looking cop, there was no one hiding out, the cars owner answered questions for the police department willingly, and i turned out the suspicious lights. i still sent the kids home though (even if the "perimeter was clear"). then i cried.

somebody go to the bathroom. it always makes the food come.

i notice that i eat out way too much. i don't always have big meals or a rootin' tootin' time every time i go out...but i'm out all the same. sad story, the waiters at one place in town know what i order and sometimes even ask "do you need a menu tonight?" and another place in town greets me with "hey you're here!" i used to think it was because i had such a stellar personality that i left a lasting impression. however, i think it has nothing to do with my personality and rather everything to do with my frequency. so why go out so much?
i thought about that too and i think i have an answer that makes sense. it's 3-fold really:

1. cooking for one sucks.
2. cleaning the kitchen sucks more.
3. going out means that i don't eat alone...and conversation is pretty fun.

so about the cooking. it's not cheaper or easier to cook for 1 person. most food does not come in 1 person portions and the food that does is typically frozen in a box prior to heating for 4-5 minutes on high. it's not always yummy to defrost dinner. when you cook for 1 it takes a long time. unless, again, it's a sweet frozen meal you can spend the same amount of time in the kitchen cooking for 4 as 1. that is discouraging and unfair. after i spend all that time in prep work i don't even think it looks good anymore.
then there is the clean-up...gag. cooking for 1 means dirtying up just about as many dishes as a whole family. pots and pans are just pots and pans. they have to be cleaned all the same. it really is exhausting. you cook all the food. eating is fast and then you clean up. no one shares the chore and it doesn't do itself. sometimes i think my mom wanted children so she could stop doing dishes and it makes sense to me.
last the conversation, or lack thereof, when you dine alone in your home. boo. no fun. unless CSI:NY is on i like to have people to talk to. it makes meals more homey. it makes time fly by. it makes you feel like less of a loser. the company alone is reason enough to get out!
all that said...i'm going to heat up my lean cuisine. delicious. no. oh well.